The Squid.
There once was a squid and whatever he did
He couldn't discover his willy.
He looked for it here, he looked for it there,
He looked for it under the telly.
He searched in the bracken, he searched in his shed,
He peered in his dustbin, he looked in his bed.
And then in his Kitchen he found something thin,
He scrutinized it closely, and he started to grin.
It was small it was pink and it gave him a wink,
And it smiled as it lay on his floor.
So he called up his girl to give it a whirl,
But she squealed when she walked through the door.
It was only a worm and it started to squirm,
Which his girlfriend informed him was similar,
All he wanted was fun with his trousers undone
But the worm just wasn't familiar.
So as you repose with jam on your nose,
And jam on your trousers, and jam on your toes,
You suddenly realise that Squids take to breeding
Like worms take to chocolate, or ducks take to reading.
And as you repose with jam on your toes
The poem you're reading must end I suppose.